23 August 2013

Mom Strength

I had to face one of my biggest fears yesterday.

When Elsie fell, The color left her face and her whole body went limp. Her little cries were almost worse than if she had been screaming. They were slow, quiet and sad. I could almost feel the pain she was in. Something was not right. 

We called 911 but since the hospital was less than 2 minutes away, we just told them we were on our way. I sat in back with Elsie. Her eyes were continually wanting to droop shut, but I just kept singing to her and couldn't let her fall asleep. 

Once in the ER they began assessing her. We didn't know if it was her head, her neck, her back.... 
She was just so sullen, floppy, dazed, sad. Nothing like the energetic baby we knew and loved.

They decided to do a CT scan to check her head and neck. Watching the doctors wheel her away from us was awful. 10 minutes. Thats how long they said she would be gone. It turned into 35 minutes that felt like years.

When they brought her back, they had strapped her to a board and her head and neck were strapped and braced so she couldn't move. My heart was thumping so hard I was sure everyone could hear it. 

They said it was just precautionary and we should have the CT results soon.

While we were waiting, I just sat there next to Elsie and sang all her favorite songs. She would look over at me with her eyes, since she couldn't turn her head, and then start to doze again. 

I was amazed at how calm I stayed. I could only imagine how scared she was feeling. I needed to stay there with her, holding her hand, telling her it was okay.

Chase kept checking the monitors. Her heart and oxygen remained strong.

Results from the scan came back and they believed there was a fracture in her skull just above her neck. They decided to ambulance us to Primary Children's so she could be there with specialists if need be.

Once we arrive at the children's hospital they immediately took her of off the board and checked her neck and back. With the doctors approval I got to hold her. 

She buried her face into my chest and then looked up at me and smiled. The first smile since she fell. My heart melted. She was beginning to resemble the talkative busy body she is. Chase and I were ecstatic.

It was now 1:00 in the morning and we were all exhausted.

The doctor confirmed the fracture in her skull and gave us the good news that there was no further damage, no internal bleeding, and she would make a full recovery. I literally felt the weight lift off my chest. Chase's sigh of relief said he felt it too.

The next part was just a waiting game to be sure she could eat and hold it down. She only threw up once and at 3:00 am they said we could go home.

I cannot even begin to express how grateful I am for modern medicine and for the power of the priesthood. Our little bug is already so much better and continuing to improve. I am also grateful for the strength that I was blessed with through all of this. I was able to remain calm and collected though the entire process. I could talk to her and sing to her and calm her down when she would begin to cry. 

Thank you all for the prayers and kind words. You're seriously the greatest.

Oh this girl has my heart and I am so grateful she is okay.


1 comment:

ali said...

Hi Erika,
I've been reading your blog for a while now and I actually love your updates because our baby girls are only 2 days apart, so it's really cool to see someone who's Gemma's age! Elsie seems like a sweetie and I just want you to know I'm praying for her and you. This post broke my heart and I feel for you- we have not been in a similar situation, but nothing is worse that worrying about your sweet babe. I have no idea what you must have been going through. Prayers for your family and that your sweet Elsie is recovering quickly and she goes back to her happy self! xo
Ali

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